everything will flow

澳大利亚土著酗酒那段和“忧郁的热带”中的描述一样，话说看“忧郁的热带”并对人类学有那么一些些了解也是因为老头的推荐

96年老头就有制作歌剧的想法了

文中提到老头想带孩子们去看他中学时的老师，孩子们指的是哪几个？

8/2/96@Sydney

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On July thirty-first we left for Sydney. We get to Sydney at five am on August second. This is the first time in my life to fly for twenty-two hours straight. It is also my first time to visit Australia. But, I have this feeling already that I won't be coming here too much in the future.

After checking in the hotel, I go straight to bed. At twelve o'clock I have press interviews for TV, newspaper and radio. It ends at six pm. I was afraid that I wouldn't understand the heavy Australian accent, but it turned out it wasn't really a problem for me to understand what they were saying. But I still get nervous when I do radio and TV interviews in English.

I go to a Japanese restaurant near the hotel with John and Sky. The place resembles a typical Japanese tavern. There are a lot of Australians there too.The restaurant seems very popular.

It has been 200 years since Australia was founded. It is a land made of immigrants and there are still a lot of immigrants here. There is a China town here too. It seems there isn't much racism or prejudice here. But the native people of this land, the Aboriginees, all live in the slums. I am told that many suffer from alchoholism. This is the price one pays for having the British, French and Spanish come to your land. They just barge their way in uninvited, conquer it and act as if the land is theirs and rule it. And for thousands of years it has been this way.

Humans are sinful beings. When will the sinners be persecuted? When will the victims be saved?

I must write a requiem. Throughout my music rings the sound of a requiem for the suffering. The requiem is not about melancholy. It is to do with an anger froma deep depression. An anger towards history. An anger towards humans. An anger beyond words. It is an anger that says, "I will make you pay for what you have done to us". No matter how evil of a person you are, every man would shed their tears over their mother. It is not about mourning over something, it is way past all that. But deep down I have a feeling that nothing can ever be done to undo our history. It will be a requiem as an opera. I do not know yet where I will find the story to model my ideas on. Dostoevsky? Dante?

Jet lag keeps me awake all night. I was in Europe for almost a month and I have not been to this side of the Pacific for a while. I guess I have to tough this one out.

I have pain in my shoulders and lower back. I must be getting old.

I spoke to Maenaka yesterday. . Maenaka was one of my teachers in high school who taught modern literature. Ever since high school we have been friends. I invite him to all of my concerts. I am told he will not live past August because of cancer. I really want him to make it through this month so that I can see him one last time when I am there in two weeks. Perhaps this is a selfish thought. I want him to meet my children. I have learned a lot of things from Maenaka. We talked a lot about Japanese literature: Dazai, Soseki, Ooe, Yoshimoto, Kitamura and the Manyoushu.

The sun begins to rise in Sydney. I am supposed to be sleepy by now. I have a drink, but I am still not sleepy. I guess sometimes one has days like this.

In Australia, you can go straight to MSN at 19,200bps.